Alachua County Voters' Nonpartisan Field Guide

We're down to the wire until the big day: November 4th. Unfortunately, a lot of folks don't realize that we'll vote on a lot more than just the Presidential candidate. I just took a look at the sample ballot for my precinct, and I think the average college-aged citizen in Gainesville has no idea what everything else means. I know I don't, and it's my goal to get educated between now and the election so that I can make an informed decision.

So let's go through a sample ballot for Alachua County, and I'll provide links along the way for your information.


First of all, here's where you can find your precinct, and here's where you can view sample ballots.

PRESIDENT AND VICE PRESIDENT

This one is getting all the attention (obviously). Take a look at the full list - I'll provide links to the candidates' web sites:

John McCain
Sarah Palin
REP

Barack Obama
Joe Biden
DEM

Gloria La Riva
Eugene Puryear
PSL (Party for Socialism and Liberation)

Chuck Baldwin
Darrell Castle
CPF (Constitution Party)

Gene Amondson
Leroy Pletten
PRO (Prohibition Party)

Bob Barr
Wayne A. Root
LBT (Libertarian Party)

Thomas Robert Stevens
Alden Link
OBJ (Objectivist Party)

James Harris
Alyson Kennedy
SWP (Socialist Workers Party)

Cynthia McKinney
Rosa Clemente
GRE (Green Party)

Alan Keyes
Brian Rohrbough
AIP (America's Independent Party)

Ralph Nader
Matt Gonzalez
ECO (Peace and Freedom Party)

Brian Moore
Stewart Alexander
SPF (Socialist Party)

Charles Jay
John Wayne Smith
BTP (Boston Tea Party)

REPRESENTATIVE IN CONGRESS - DISTRICT 6
(Your district may be different)

Clifford B. (Cliff) Stearns (REP, Incumbent)
Tim Cunha (DEM)

Next are the County Commissioners. You can read the profiles of the incumbents at the Alachua County site. I'll also provide the links for everyone.

COUNTY COMMISSIONER - DISTRICT 1

Kevin Riordan (REP)
Mike Byerly (DEM, Incumbent)

COUNTY COMMISSIONER - DISTRICT 3

Lloyd W. Bailey, Jr. (REP)
Paula M. DeLaney (DEM, Incumbent)

COUNTY COMMISSIONER - DISTRICT 5

Ward Scott (REP)
Rodney Long (DEM)

NONPARTISAN

These are the judges. A lot of these are just questions of retention, and unless you know of someone doing something illegal, or do extensive research on their rulings, you're probably going to just vote yes. However, for your information:

JUSTICE OF THE SUPREME COURT
Shall Justice Charles T. Wells of the Florida Supreme Court be retained in office?

DISTRICT COURT OF APPEAL
Shall Judge Robert T. Benton of the First District Court of Appeal be retained in office?

Shall Judge Marguerite H. Davis of the First District Court of Appeal be retained in office?

Shall Judge Joseph Lewis Jr. of the First District Court of Appeal be retained in office?

Shall Judge Ricky L. Polston of the First District Court of Appeal be retained in office? (This one's a little confusing to me, because apparently he's been named to the Florida Supreme Court.)

Shall Judge Clay Roberts of the First District Court of Appeal be retained in office?

Shall Judge William A. Van Nortwick Jr. of the First District Court of Appeal be retained in office?

COUNTY JUDGE - GROUP 2
Denise Ferrero
Lorraine H. Sherman

ALACHUA COUNTY SOIL AND WATER CONSERVATION DISTRICT - Group 2
David T. Gildart
Todd P. Martin (incumbent; can't find a link for him)

ALACHUA COUNTY SOIL AND WATER CONSERVATION DISTRICT - Group 4
Rob Brinkman
Mary Ann Gosa (Incumbent)
(Sorry -- can't find links for either of them).

PROPOSED CONSTITUTIONAL AMENDMENTS

These are proposed amendments to the Florida Constitution. Here's a good summary for these amendments. It does a good job, so I'm not going to try to recreate it.

COUNTY REFERENDA

Here's another great summary, this time of the Alachua County Referenda.

MUNICIPAL

FOR or AGAINST annexation of property described in Ordinance Number 080137 of the City of Gainesville.

I'm trying to understand what this means (it relates to some property near SW 20th Ave, which is quite relevant to me). This is the legislative file and these are the meeting minutes when it was adopted by the City Commission.

Update: Apparently I don't live within Gainesville city limits. Great. Here is more information about the pro side. Is there even a con side to this?

And there you have it. Good luck on Election Day, and please feel free to post with any additional information.

Cheers,
Sam

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An Outlet

Well, here I sit. It's August 5th. Melissa is in Mexico on a missions trip, which means I'm alone for a week for the first time in the year we've been married.

I find myself feeling a little reflective. My refuge thus far in my week has been everything I felt a connection with before getting married: Emily Dickinson, Joanna Newsom, Elliott Smith, and a hundred other poems, songs, and artists. But there's this huge gap between where my brain connects with my heart. I can't seem to get back to that place I was back when I was single.

I guess I really am a different person.

I've drifted more and more down to earth in what art (in any form) to which I feel connected. Suddenly lyrics by The Mountain Goats feel more profound than they used to. Earthy. Real. I can't place it.

I've been thrown into real life, and there are very few five-dollar words or lofty treatments of truth and beauty.

"I've stopped looking for royal cities in the air," to borrow a phrase from Josh Ritter.

"I'd ask you about love. You'd probably quote me a sonnet." I've always loved Good Will Hunting, but mainly from the side of a Will-wannabe who tried to understand Sean as best as he could. I spent hours reading and digesting all sorts of knowledge, after some holy grail of what I wanted my life to be like.

And especially what I wanted love to be like. Romeo and Juliet, Amélie, even The House of Flying Daggers (especially that part where he picks up the flowers on the horse). Not realizing the whole time that Sam and Melissa would be every bit as brilliant, every bit as colorful, every bit as creative as any of those stories.

God creates better stories than we do.

I've learned that lofty words don't really mean much. God has given me something that I cannot define -- it defines me. True love, the kind that makes me want to do anything for Melissa at any time, no matter what I think of it. The kind that pushes me and pushes me again to be sacrificial, and any time I want to give up, I find myself once again being pushed.

That kind of love can't really be described. It can't really be put into words. It makes every song or book I've heard or read seem trite or overly simplistic or too idealistic (or too morbid or cynical, for that matter). The pain and the joy that comes with marriage, with one reinforcing the other, can only be experienced.

I recently came across some songs I had recorded a couple of years ago. Well meaning songs, with heartfelt lyrics reflecting real pain. I couldn't help but smile at some and laugh out loud at others. I was so worried about things, and so convinced that so many other girls were perfect for me.

And I was so damn cynical.

Well, that's enough for now. Let me know your thoughts.

Oh, and if anyone wants to hang out this week, give me a call (or an Fbook post). I'm available after 5 any day, and all day Saturday.
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The Media and Ron Paul

Normally I'm not too into conspiracies. If there's anything my experience at UF has taught me, it's that history is complicated. The "official position" of the winners is usually wrong, and the conspiracy theorists are usually wrong. The answer often lies in between.

I can't help but feel like we're in the middle of a conspiracy when it comes to the media's coverage of Ron Paul. Ron Paul is monstrously popular on the internet and with young voters. See here for a YouTube video that represents it pretty well.

Mainstream media coverage of Paul is, well, appalling. His presence in the debates has been laughable. (Incidentally, watch the video at the end of that article and see how uncomfortable the other candidates are while Paul is speaking about the war in Iraq being unconstitutional and the need to address our foreign policy.) This article also sums up the situation nicely.

Seriously, I could go on and on about this. But the straw that broke the camel's back for me was this article from NPR . The article calls Ron Paul an iconoclast and assumes that he is going to get nowhere in the election. Despite this, they offer these stats:

- Last week, he raised $1.85 million in a 24-hour period.
- He's a superstar on YouTube with over 7 million viewers clicking on his offerings.
- Until Tuesday's Florida primary, Paul had beaten former New York Mayor Rudolph Giuliani in Iowa, Michigan, Nevada and South Carolina. Giuliani bested Paul in New Hampshire by 2,092 votes. (Paul campaigned in some of these states, while Giuliani focused mainly on Florida).
- Paul had captured 106,414 votes to Giuliani's 60,220 -- even though the press touted Giuliani as a frontrunner. (See NPR primary map)
- Paul came in second, albeit a distant second, in a field of seven Republicans in Nevada.

NPR says they've received over 200 individual emails complaining about the lack of coverage for Ron Paul (e.g. the fact that he's been mentioned only 160 times in the past six months -- that's not even once a day). Shockingly, they don't offer an apology in this article, they offer a defense:

"Yes, Paul has raised lots of money and has many dedicated supporters," said Larry Sabato, director of the Center for Politics at the University of Virginia. "That's all good, but even Ron Paul realizes he is not going to be the GOP presidential nominee. There is a happy golden mean of major and minor candidates somewhere. No one ever finds it's to everyone's satisfaction. The good news is that news organizations don't conspire."

NPR's Elving, a seasoned veteran of eight presidential races, said he is prepared to give Paul greater coverage when he is no longer an 'also-ran' in Republican primaries. "When and if he becomes an independent or third party candidate," said Elving, "he may become a far larger factor in the eventual general election outcome. At that point, news coverage will increase appropriately."

The number of comments left on the page indicate to me that it's not only conspiracy theorists that are upset with this.

Does anyone else find it strange that an anti-war, anti-tax, pro-life candidate who also happens to have a massive following is being dismissed almost entirely from the media? Whether you agree with his views or not (and I'm sure many disagree, as he can't really satisfy most Republicans or most Democrats), one would think he'd at least get a fair shake. It's not like his only supporters are his family or something.

Anyway, that's my two cents on the subject. I've heard this is also the case with Kucinich, but I don't know the details of that.

Peace,
Sam
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On News of Her Passing

I just read that the wife of a dear friend has passed away. My heart aches for him. After a marriage of somewhere around fifty years, she became ill, and now she's gone.

We prayed for the two of them every night over the past month or two when we heard she was sick. That God would heal her. That God's will would be done. That God would comfort him.

It is especially poignant when here I am, so fresh and new in the world of marriage. I am just becoming accustomed to the joys of knowing Melissa, to the deep, precious friendship that grows stronger every day. She is everything to me. I would do anything for her. And I don't say that in a cliché, romantic comedy kind of way. Because I've learned that "doing anything" for the woman you love means rubbing her feet after you've been at work for 8 hours. It means doing the dishes. It doesn't mean vanquishing evil.

But this is six months, not sixty years. This is infancy, with the world new and bright. Learning to talk, learning to walk. We hold hands and learn the names of things together, and all our plans for our lives are like playing pretend. We dream of our house and children while we sit alone in our one bedroom apartment. We're playing dress-up still, really.

Yet still I cling to her, and love her more than I could think possible. Words fall short. It's a love that describes me, not one that I can sum up with a sentence or a pithy quote. It's part of something greater, something that exists without me, that existed before me.

What was their love? If I am so submerged in this nascent love, what is the depth of a love that has seen so much over so long? Is it a torrent, or a Great Lake?

In the midst of this, I have to remember that it is not just love that conquers all, but Love that conquered all.

"And if Christ has not been raised, your faith is futile and you are still in your sins. Then those also who have fallen asleep in Christ have perished. If in Christ we have hope in this life only, we are of all people most to be pitied.

But in fact Christ has been raised from the dead, the firstfruits of those who have fallen asleep. For as by a man came death, by a man has come also the resurrection of the dead. For as in Adam all die, so also in Christ shall all be made alive. But each in his own order: Christ the firstfruits, then at his coming those who belong to Christ. Then comes the end, when he delivers the kingdom to God the Father after destroying every rule and every authority and power. For he must reign until he has put all his enemies under his feet. The last enemy to be destroyed is death. For 'God has put all things in subjection under his feet.' But when it says, 'all things are put in subjection,' it is plain that he is excepted who put all things in subjection under him. When all things are subjected to him, then the Son himself will also be subjected to him who put all things in subjection under him, that God may be all in all."

- 1 Corinthians 15:17-28

Grace and peace,
Sam
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Back (Again) with Lots of Thoughts

Hey everyone,

Well, I think I'm back to blogging regularly. It's been a very interesting and exciting first six months of marriage. Allow me to update you on some things...

Books

I've been reading and listening to lots of books on different subjects these days. These have consisted in several books by Dr. Andrew Weil, a few by Jim Cramer, one called Learned Optimism, and many more. They basically break down into finance, health, and relationships.

Recently finished books that have hit me hard include Each for the Other and The DNA of Relationships. Yes, I am in fact a married man now.

School

I am just about finished with school. I'll be graduating in May with my degree in religion. I am finishing up my thesis this semester. It's been a long, slow road, but ultimately a good one.

Career

Many of you know that I've decided to pursue a career in financial planning. This requires becoming certified by the CFP Board. The process includes education, a massive test, and a ton of experience. I'm really excited about it, though. I've really gotten into this kind of thing through podcasts like The Money Guy and The Disciplined Investor.

I hope to take this certification and start a private practice. Eventually, I would like to merge my interests in religion. It would be ideal for me to get an M.Div. and manage some sort of charitable trust portfolio or become a non-profit financial consultant.

CSN

Christian Service Network has not died. It has just taken a much, much longer time to get it going. Inquire within for details and to help.

That's all for now. Keep checking back. I plan on really using this thing now. I need the outlet.

Sam
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Zaadz = Way Cool

I recently joined the online community Zaadz. It's social networking with a purpose. I'll just let the head honcho describe it:

Welcome! Let's Change the World.

This is Brian, your friendly Philosopher & CEO here at Zaadz. On behalf of our entire team, I’d like to welcome you to our little Oasis on the web. Thrilled you’ve found us. Here’s a quick intro to what we’re up to:

Our Name. We’ll start with the name. zaad. It’s Dutch for “seed.” Amazing how much potential is in a tiny seed, eh? We think so, too. That power reminds us of the amazing potential within each of us. We thought the idea of creating a company that inspires and empowers you to bring your “seed” to actualization would be pretty powerful. So, we created “Zaadz.”

Our Mission. We’re gonna change the world. Our math goes like this: you be the change + you follow your bliss + you give your greatest strengths to the world moment to moment to moment + we do everything in our power to help you succeed + you inspire and empower everyone you know to do the same + we team up with millions like us = we just affected billions = we (together) changed the world.

Our Plan. Ours involves Conscious Capitalism infused with Spirituality and a healthy dose of Enthusiasm, Love, Service, Inspiration, Passion, Humor and Teamwork. People CRAZY enough to think they can change the world, Courageous enough to do something about it, AND Committed enough to stick to it when they feel like giving up.

We’re in the process of building THE most inspired community of people in the world…social networking with a purpose, a community of seekers and conscious entrepreneurs circulating wisdom and inspiration and wealth and all that good stuff. We’re passionate about inspiring and empowering people to bring their dreams to life, learning and growing and getting paid to do what they love, using their greatest gifts in the greatest service to the world. (And having fun in the process!)

Our Community. You (& Your Friends). Yes, you. You want more than the 9-5, the house and the car, the conditioning. The blah! Life is to be lived - Fully. In spirit. In love. In service. In celebration. (You’ve already swallowed the red pill, so let’s go…)

Us. A community of Leaders, Visionaries, Thinkers, Artists, Writers,
Healers, Teachers, Activists, Environmentalists, Conscious Entrepreneurs, and Many (many!) Others. People
of many ages (from 12 to 90), many nationalities, from different countries
(over 110!) and different backgrounds. Some already making huge differences
in thousands of lives, others working to make a difference starting with
themselves.

We’re thrilled you’ve joined us so early on and are excited to change the world together.

Namaste,

Brian Johnson, Philosopher & CEO

What are you waiting for? Check it out!
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Jesus Camp

I'm in Fort Wayne, eating some DeBrand chocolate, sipping some mint green tea, and relaxing. I decided to pop in Jesus Camp, a 2006 documentary about Evangelical (Pentecostal, actually) child-raising. Now, it seems like recently a slew of new media has come out to take on the Christian right. The book Why the Christian Right is Wrong, the documentary With God On Our Side, and a number of other books, movies, and scholarly articles are analyzing the rise of the Moral Majority, the Christian Right, or whatever you want to call it, whether in passing or as the main focus of the work. Some are insightful, some are vitriolic, some are scholarly, some are, well, not scholarly. As a religion major, I'll take what I can get. I can usually find some sort of silver lining to even the most banal treatments of a religious topic. Taking shots at extreme Christianity is about as ubiquitous as Starbucks and as cheap as Raman noodles these days, but even then I can salvage some good, add it to my ever-growing bank of religious knowledge, and move on.

I'll go ahead and say that Jesus Camp is no exception, although it suffers from the fact that I'm getting sick of the subject. The reason I'm writing, though, is because I have a special connection to this particular angle on the matter. Let's review some facts about me and my background:

- I was born into a Christian family; my Mom was raised Catholic and became a Charismatic mostly-Evangelical, while my Dad has remained Presbyterian most of his life.
- I fall into Jesus Camp's statistics neatly: I first "accepted Jesus into my heart" when I was about 5 years old. Do I think it was a genuine conversion? Honestly, yes. Do I have some sort of empirical justification for this? Not really, but do you have some sort of empirical justification for any belief or behavior held at the age of 5? I didn't think so. However, theologically, I don't really believe in a single conversion moment per se. I don't want to get too technical here, though, so I'll just say that I first converted to some form of Christianity - whether socialized or not - at 5, only to adhere to a more personal form of the faith in high school.
- I attended Christian school from kindergarten through third grade.
- I went to, yes, a Jesus Camp when I was eight years old.
- I experienced all those crazy things you see in Jesus Camp: speaking in tongues, falling down, crying uncontrollably, etc. I earnestly believed in all of it...for a period of time.
- During 11th grade, I entered a second phase of my faith, culminating in a dramatic experience around the time of my grandfather's death.
- In college, I ventured over to the Presbyterians, flirting with Greek Orthodoxy and some other things along the way.
- I study Christian history like it's my job. It sort of is for these four years in college.

Now let's review some other facts about myself:

- I like gay people. Imagine that.
- I don't think George W. Bush is a saint.
- I love The Daily Show and The Colbert Report.
- I love NPR, The Nation, and all kinds of other semi-liberal to liberal media.
- I love the Civic Media Center in Gainesville.
- I love America.
- I hate a great deal of things about America.

Now, don't get me wrong here. I am not, by any means, making this a saccharin, bleeding-heart post to say, "Hey! I turned out okay! Those creepy Christians didn't get to me, I'm a liberal!"

No. Not at all - I shy away from a label of "liberal" or "conservative," though we all know I'm no Sean Hannity. But I am writing to say that I simultaneously believe in liberal political causes, conservative political causes, the absolute sovereignty of God, the infallibility of Scripture, the need to love everyone (yes, even gay people - sorry Turlington preachers!), and a number of other seemingly contradictory things. But hey, don't we all? Who tows the party line in every facet of their lives? And don't we live this way regardless of or even because of how we grew up?

What's my point? Well, for starters, it's that movies like Jesus Camp are a tremendous oversimplification. Turning footage of a Pentecostal church camp in South Dakota into an ominous statement about the future of our children is not exactly five-star work. I could do the same thing with a McDonald's around the corner (oh wait, that's been done too).

Clarity: I do think that Evangelical children's ministry and education contributes to a so-called "army of Republicans," but it'll take a while to convince me that it has a role any greater than rampant materialism, socioeconomic disparity, or, of course, the fact that Republican parents often raise Republican children.

Wait a second, can't we make the same argument about liberal parents? About public education? About secular humanism? About YMCA Day Camp!? For goodness sake, any time you teach children something, you indoctrinate them! Aren't we making value judgments here? Now who's intolerant?

On a more specific level, the film is a huge oversimplification of the sociological elements of religious indoctrination. Which comes first: political leanings, socioeconomic status, or religious belief? If you can answer that in less than six pages and a bibliography (and that's being pretty generous), you're oversimplifying. Jesus Camp focuses on the latter without any mention of the other components of moral or religious development.

Come on, folks, let's get real. If there's anything I've learned from my liberal arts education, it's that life is complicated. History is complicated, religion is complicated, and, for crying out loud, the moral and intellectual development of society is complicated.

All of this reminds me of Dr. Sommerville's book The Decline of the Secular University (shameless plug), as well as some of Dr. Richard Horner's work. What is the centering text here? What frames what? Why is it that democracy can frame religion but not the other way around?

My suggestion: read Sommerville and the classic Habits of the Heart.

Okay, the last thing I'll do is criticize the subject of Jesus Camp - Evangelical Christianity as represented in the film. What's my main criticism? There's absolutely no mention of grace, which is probably the defining characteristic of Christian doctrine in the history of religion. But that's for another post.

My next criticism? Politics, of course. But you already knew that.

Peace,
Sam
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love

lately, i've been thinking a lot about the following:

love is patient and kind;

love does not envy or boast;

it is not arrogant or rude.

it does not insist on its own way;

it is not irritable or resentful;

it does not rejoice at wrongdoing, but rejoices with the truth.

love bears all things,

believes all things,

hopes all things,

endures all things.

it's amazing how difficult these simple words are to follow. my relationship with melissa tries me and tests me and stretches me.

but listen: "bears all things, believes all things, hopes all things, endures all things." all things. geez.

that's a bit of a stretch for this divorce-happy culture. it seems like people get divorced these days over all things. undivided loyalty is pretty hard to find.

so i haven't been writing in a while. i really should. i have a lot more time now that it's the summer. well, sort of. i'm doing a lot of things, as usual.

but hey, this blog has been around for almost a year. that's pretty spiffy.

miss you all.

peace,
sam
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Help Stevie!

Borrowed from Molly Hedrick:

Steve Hedrick (aka Riverman) is a 21 year-old musician from Orlando. At various moments you will find him playing guitar, piano, percussion, accordion!, bango, violin, or the harmonica. He writes all his own music and sings. He describes his music as "neo-folk-rock with a Beach Boys twist."

Steve works at Starbucks in his off-time. Recently, Starbucks had a contest to find untapped talent from within their ranks, and gave their employees the chance to submit original music. Out of 800 submissions, Steve's song, "Light of the Moon" was one of 15 who made it on the CD, "Off the Clock"(available at locations nationwide).
We now have the opportunity to vote on the 15 finalists to decide who will be the Grand Prize Winner. Let's make it happen! Here's how:

Go to Hear Music. At the bottom of the screen, there is a picture of "Off the Clock." Click on it. At the bottom of the screen, you will see some brightly colored dots. Click on the one that says, "Listen and Vote." The list of the contestants will come up. Steve is listed under the name 'Riverman.' All you need is a valid e-mail address. If you could each take 2-3 minutes and enter any addresses you could think of, we could really help Steve. Those 2-3 minutes could mean a big opportunity for him. Thank you!

Molly (The Proud Little Sister)

Stevie is a really, really good friend of mine. Please, please, PLEASE vote for him!! He is amazingly talented -- one of the greatest musicians I know in my age group. He deserves this so much. It could easily be his big break.

So, click here and help him out!

Peace,
Sam
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StumbleUpon

Holy cow, I'm addicted to StumbleUpon, a Firefox extension that allows you to surf the web by category.

Wow.

Check it out.
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on finishing perks

today i finished reading the perks of being a wallflower. melissa gave it to me. i wouldn't have thought that i would like it if you told me about it ahead of time, but for some reason i did. i really felt like i could relate to it. and it gave me a little insight into myself.

the thing is that my personality is very similar to charlie's, especially when i was in high school. quiet, introspective, insightful. but what strikes me is that charlie found outlets for what he felt through drugs or sex or drinking. of course, the point is that he just went along with everything, not really knowing whether he enjoyed those things or not. but still. it makes me think. i relate to charlie so well in feeling like there is something wrong with me, or in feeling like things are slipping away or spinning out of control. but i when was in high school, i suppressed most of those feelings and spun into my own imaginary world. fantasies of lsd, not lsd itself. and only a select few knew of my crippling depression until it started to seep out my senior year. but i can't help but wonder if part of the seriousness of my depression in high school was because i felt trapped. i felt like i had to bottle everything in. i wasn't allowed to go to parties or whatever. and girls didn't like me. unlike charlie, i didn't have girls ask me on dates. instead, i had to live vicariously through my friends' acid trips and their first forays into relationships and sex.

i don't know. i just think it's interesting. i just wonder how that has affected me.

peace,
sam
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blue like...

Well, once again it's been ages. I guess between school and wedding planning, I have a lot on my plate. But I'd really like to get back into blogging. That is, if anyone is still reading this thing.

I spent spring break at the Palmer Home for Children. It was a good experience: raking, cutting down trees, clearing brush, roofing, and spending time with some pretty cool kids. I'm sure I'll have more thoughts on the trip another time, but right now I'm still taking it in and chewing on it.

That's what happened last year with our trip to Waveland to help out folks through Lagniappe Church, the latest project of Jean Larroux. The guy is a stud, hands down. But when I was on the trip, I didn't really feel like I was getting anything out of it. A year later, though, and I can see what an influential trip it was for me.

On a somewhat unrelated note, I finally read Blue Like Jazz. I gotta say, I have mixed feelings. On the one hand, I did enjoy his candor, and I particularly liked his thoughts on loving people who aren't like us. On the other hand, I thought his version of Christianity seemed pretty watered down. The biggest flaw was that it seemed like his feelings pretty much determined everything he did. Rather than really seeking for the meaning of Scripture, he just sort of wandered around, letting the Bible influence him just as much as a TV show or a poem. That seems like a somewhat flaky version of Christianity, in my opinion. I think intellectual rigor needs to be a prominent part of Christianity, especially a devotion to attempting to understand the Bible on its own terms.

And it's entirely possible. I went to see a lecture by N.T. Wright, the formidable scholar, eloquent speaker, and Bishop of Durham. He spoke on "Paul's Jewish Gospel for a Gentile World," an extremely engaging and accessible lecture regarding the distinctive Jewish qualities of Paul's message. Partway through, he shifted gears and discussed "Paul's Gospel for a Post-Modern, Post-Secular, Neo-Imperialist World," an extremely relevant discussion of how to proclaim Christ as Messiah in the 21st century. He did it with charm, insight, feeling, and sound reasoning. I guess it can be done.

The other thing that bothered me about Blue Like Jazz, aside from the fact that it sounded like it was written by a seventeen year-old kid, is that Miller seems almost entirely ignorant of Christian history. His tone makes it sound like he has discovered some revolutionary version of Christianity. His whole account of his spiritual journey really doesn't differ much from Augustine, Wesley, Ignatius, or even Nathan Cole, a farmer who converted after hearing a sermon by Whitefield. I just feel like Miller could use a little perspective. American Christianity is by no means representative of all of Christianity. It's only a small facet of hundreds of years and hundreds of cultures. And each has had its flaws.

That's all for now. I'm tired. But I'm really going to try to write on this thing again. I'm now reading The Perks of Being a Wallflower and Life at the Bottom. You know, in addition to writing a ton of papers and reading a ton of books about Jesus and the Hindu goddess Sitala.

Peace,
Sam
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More Merton

The wise man has struggled to find You in his wisdom, and he has failed. The just man has striven to grasp You in his own justice, and he has gone astray.

But the sinner, suddenly struck by the lightning of mercy that ought to have been justice, falls down in adoration of Your holiness: for he had seen what kings desired to see and never saw, what prophets foretold and never gazed upon, what the men of ancient times grew weary of expecting when they died. He has seen that Your love is so infinitely good that it cannot be the object of a human bargain. True, there are two testaments, two bargains. But both of them are only promises that You would freely give us what we could never deserve: that You would manifest Your holiness to us by showing us Your mercy and Your liberality and Your infinite freedom.

- Thomas Merton, No Man is an Island
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what do you expect?

Melissa and I just watched a couple of hours of To Catch a Predator, a series of Dateline special investigations about so-called "child predators." Feel free to check out the site and watch some videos. Ultimately, though, I believe this series is doing more harm than good.

Here's how it works:

1. Random guy starts talking to police decoy online.
2. Decoy pretends to be a 13 year old girl (or boy) and starts talking about sex.
3. Random guy starts to enjoy the fantasy, starts saying stupid things.
4. Decoy gets guy to agree to meet.
5. Random guy, in a moment of sheer stupidity, agrees to meet.
6. Random guy goes to decoy house.
7. Guy gets busted by Dateline and then the cops.
8. Guy's life is essentially ruined.

In 90% of the cases, I'd say the guys were in a moment of stupidity. I doubt any of them would have really done anything with a child. They were scared out of their minds when they got caught, not like the smug serial killers or rapists who say they'd do it again. One of the men was a doctor who was probably just having a mid-life crisis. Now he has probably lost his medical license. Just reading stories of child molesters shows you the kind of people who really do the molesting. Most of the time, they are pretty deranged and a lot more clever than to fall into the trap of a sting. A lot of them also prefer sex with minors (shudder), whereas most of these men were just playing around with a fantasy - like playing with fire. Yes, it's a sick fantasy, but the internet is a pretty sick place.

Most of these men were completely normal. They weren't smarmy, shady creeps. They were normal guys. Guess what? They had sexual addictions. And guess what else? Odds are that the cops arresting these guys have a sexual addiction as well.

According to one site, there were 27.5 million U.S. visitors to adult-oriented pornographic Web sites in January 2002, of which about 72% of visitors were men and 28% women.

Did you catch that? 27.5 million Americans in 2002. And that's five years ago, folks. According to US News and World Report, the pornography industry takes in more than $8 billion a year (I've seen higher figures elsewhere), which is more than rock and country music, and more than all Broadway productions, theater, ballet, jazz and classical music combined.

So here's the problem. What on earth is randomly throwing in prison a bunch of normal guys going to accomplish? A 2002 study determined that Hollywood currently releases 11,000 adult movies per year – more than 20 times the mainstream movie production. You get the idea. You can find more of these shocking statistics here (at a site which is a particular favorite of mine). I'm betting that given enough prompting and begging and goading, a lot of men in this country would succumb to the temptation of illegal sex. If you don't believe me, go read up on sex tourism.

Maybe we should start working on the root of the problem. You know, like the fact that there was a Victoria's Secret ad on the Dateline web site when I was working on this post (see screenshot). My point is precisely the title of this post: what do you expect? In a country where the revenues of the porn industry are more than those of the NFL, NBA, and MLB combined, is it any wonder when women have become degraded so much that children are being sought after as the next "sexual high"?

Don't get me wrong. I'm not defending any of these men. What they did (or intended to do) was wrong, and with Proverbs I ask: "Can a man take fire to his chest and expect not to be burned?" I am saying, though, that simply generating criminals through baiting ordinary sex addicts and then throwing them in jail isn't going to solve anything. How can we only condemn the illegal aspects of these cases without condemning first the widespread problem of infidelity through porn?

That's enough for tonight.

Peace,
Sam
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another

(begin stream of poetic consciousness)

a morning of slick winter coats
pushes and pulls and
destroys whatever
distant thoughts of driving
or flying
i once knew.
it is
a drop of spring rain
a sunset
a grain of sand
that permits me to sing
that permits me to run
past jade hills
and towering brick sarcophagi.
but there are black eyes
and black skin
and black steel
ominous tongues of metal
double-barrelled death
gripped by tiny hands
tiny teeth clenched
falsely masked by ferocity.
counterfeits.
frauds.
it is they
it is they
who cause me to cry.
who cause me to scream.
it is for them
that i clench my teeth.
that i tighten my fist.
it is for them
that i will fight.
that i will live.
i will turn these tears
to flight
and i will sing
until morning.

(end)

peace,
sam
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short

sorry it's been so long. i've been busy changing my life and starting a new semester. i'll have more later, but i just streamed this little guy:

what are we coming to?
breathing in smoke
breathing in stars
sleeping in flames
twisted
turning
revolving around
burning cinders
of complacency
i am a slit wrist
i am a shooting star
i am a smoldering wick

peace,
sam
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emily

so basically, i've recently been given the pleasure of being introduced to one of my all-time favorite songs. it's called "emily" by joanna newsom. the lyrics are beautiful. here they are:

the meadowlark and the chim-choo-ree and the sparrow
set to the sky in a flying spree, for the sport over the pharaoh
a little while later the Pharisees dragged comb through the meadow
do you remember what they called up to you and me, in our window?

there is a rusty light on the pines tonight
sun pouring wine, lord, or marrow
down into the bones of the birches
and the spires of the churches
jutting out from the shadows
the yoke, and the axe, and the old smokestacks and the bale and the barrow
and everything sloped like it was dragged from a rope
in the mouth of the south below

we've seen those mountains kneeling, felten and grey
we thought our very hearts would up and melt away
from that snow in the nighttime
just going
and going
and the stirring of wind chimes
in the morning
in the morning
helps me find my way back in
from the place where I have been

and, Emily - I saw you last night by the river
I dreamed you were skipping little stones across the surface of the water
frowning at the angle where they were lost, and slipped under forever,
in a mud-cloud, mica-spangled, like the sky'd been breathing on a mirror

anyhow - I sat by your side, by the water
you taught me the names of the stars overhead that I wrote down in my ledger
tho all I knew of the rote universe were those pleiades loosed in december
I promised you I‘d set them to verse so I'd always remember

that the meteorite is a source of the light
and the meteor's just what we see
and the meteoroid is a stone that's devoid of the fire that propelled it to thee

and the meteorite's just what causes the light
and the meteor's how it's perceived
and the meteoroid's a bone thrown from the void that lies quiet in offering to thee

you came and lay a cold compress upon the mess I'm in
threw the window wide and cried; Amen! Amen! Amen!
the whole world - stopped - to hear you hollering
you looked down and saw now what was happening

the lines are fadin' in my kingdom
(tho I have never known the way to border 'em in)
so the muddy mouths of baboons and sows and the grouse and the horse and the hen
grope at the gate of the looming lake that was once a tidy pen
and the mail is late and the great estates are not lit from within
the talk in town's becoming downright sickening

in due time we will see the far butte lit by a flare
I've seen your bravery, and I will follow you there
and row through the nighttime
gone healthy
gone healthy all of a sudden
in search of the midwife
who could help me
who could help me
help me find my way back in
there are worries where I've been

say, say, say in the lee of the bay; don't be bothered
leave your troubles here where the tugboats shear the water from the water
(flanked by furrows, curling back, like a match held up to a newspaper)
Emily, they'll follow your lead by the letter
and I make this claim, and I'm not ashamed to say I know you better
what they've seen is just a beam of your sun that banishes winter

let us go! though we know it's a hopeless endeavor
the ties that bind, they are barbed and spined and hold us close forever
though there is nothing would help me come to grips with a sky that is gaping and yawning
there is a song I woke with on my lips as you sailed your great ship towards the morning

come on home, the poppies are all grown knee-deep by now
blossoms all have fallen, and the pollen ruins the plow
peonies nod in the breeze and while they wetly bow, with
hydrocephalitic listlessness ants mop up-a their brow

and everything with wings is restless, aimless, drunk and dour
the butterflies and birds collide at hot, ungodly hours
and my clay-colored motherlessness rangily reclines
- come on home, now! all my bones are dolorous with vines

Pa pointed out to me, for the hundredth time tonight
the way the ladle leads to a dirt-red bullet of light
squint skyward and listen -
loving him, we move within his borders:
just asterisms in the stars' set order

we could stand for a century
starin'
with our heads cocked
in the broad daylight at this thing
joy
landlocked
in bodies that don't keep
dumbstruck with the sweetness of being
till we don't be
told; take this
eat this

told; the meteorite is the source of the light
and the meteor's just what we see
and the meteoroid is a stone that's devoid of the fire that propelled it to thee

and the meteorite's just what causes the light
and the meteor's how it's perceived
and the meteoroid's a bone thrown from the void that lies quiet in offering to thee

peace,
sam
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from merton to hananasif

So this has been a really good day. It started with our last Thomas Merton group of the semester (complete with pancakes). It was so refreshing to talk and pray with Gerald, Charlie, and Tyler.

This excellent day ended with a spur of the moment gig. Well, the gig itself wasn't spur of the moment - it was a benefit show for Desire Street Ministries. The spur of the moment part was that my friend Lauren called me this afternoon to see if I wanted to play djembe with her (she plays violin) and Sydney (who sings and plays guitar). If I haven't mentioned these two yet (and their usual partner, Melissa, who was unable to make it), let me say once and for all that they are incredibly talented and tremendously inspiring. It was wonderful playing with them.

Let me tell you a little more about Sydney. She is one of those people who is a flame embodied. She lives life without fear, trusting in God and dreaming big. She's traveled all kinds of places. Recently, she did a study abroad program in Tanzania. While she was there, she discovered the Hananasif orphanage. Sydney has become really involved with this place (as has Melissa - pictured above), and she spoke a lot about tonight at the gig. It was really inspiring.

Consider some facts about Tanzania from the Hananasif web site:

• Tanzania is the fifth poorest country in the world.
• Dar-es-Salaam is the third largest city in east Africa.
• Only 56% of the population has access to clean water.
• The average annual income per capita is $140.
• There were more than one million AIDS orphans in Tanzania in the year 2000.
• USAID has calculated that in the year 2010 there will be approximately 1.8 million AIDS orphans in Tanzania, unless an effective and inexpensive form of treatment is developed by that time.

Hananasif is an orphanage, school, and outreach. It's really neat. Check out the web site and also this video that Melissa made.

Peace,
Sam
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Merton Again

Read a couple of days ago in a moment of extreme despair:

"How close God is to us when we come to recognize and to accept our abjection and to cast our care entirely upon Him! Against all human expectation He sustains us when we need to be sustained, helping us to do what seemed impossible. We learn to know about Him, now, not in the 'presence' that is found in abstract consideration - a presence in which we dress Him in our own finery - but in the emptiness of a hope that may come close to despair. For perfect hope is achieved on the brink of despair when, instead of falling over the edge, we find ourselves walking on the air. Hope is always just about to turn into despair, but never does so, for at the moment of supreme crisis God's power is suddenly made perfect in our infirmity. So we learn to expect His mercy most calmly when all is most dangerous, to seek Him quietly in the face of peril, certain that He cannot fail us though we may be upbraided by the just and rejected by those who claim to hold the evidence of His love." - Thomas Merton, No Man is an Island

Peace,
Sam
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Christmas Songs

So, we're back in Christmas music mode. Have you ever stopped to read the lyrics to some of our classic songs? A lot of them are really good. I've just sung them 10,000 times and often don't even realize what I'm singing. Take a look at some of them:

Various Parts of "O Come O Come Emmanuel"
O come, Thou Wisdom from on high,
Who orderest all things mightily;
To us the path of knowledge show,
And teach us in her ways to go.

O come, Thou Rod of Jesse, free
Thine own from Satan’s tyranny;
From depths of hell Thy people save,
And give them victory over the grave.

O come, Thou Day-spring, come and cheer
Our spirits by Thine advent here;
Disperse the gloomy clouds of night,
And death’s dark shadows put to flight.

O come, Thou Key of David, come,
And open wide our heavenly home;
Make safe the way that leads on high,
And close the path to misery.

O come, Desire of nations, bind
In one the hearts of all mankind;
Bid Thou our sad divisions cease,
And be Thyself our King of Peace.

The Last Verse of "O Holy Night"
Truly He taught us to love one another;
His law is love and His Gospel is peace.
Chains shall He break for the slave is our brother
And in His Name all oppression shall cease.
Sweet hymns of joy in grateful chorus raise we,
Let all within us praise His holy Name!
Christ is the Lord! O praise His name forever!
His pow’r and glory evermore proclaim!
His pow’r and glory evermore proclaim!

This last one isn't exactly a classic, but I like it:

Relient K's "I Celebrate the Day"
With this Christmas wish is missed
The point I could convey
If only I could find the words to say to let you know
How much you've touched my life because
Here is where you're finding me
In the exact same place as New Years Eve
And from the lack of my persistency
We're less than half as close as I wanna be

And the first time that you opened your eyes
Did you realize that you would be my Savior?
And the first breath that left your lips
Did you know that it would change this world forever?

And so this Christmas I'll compare
The things I've felt in prior years
To what this midnight made so clear
That you have come to meet me here

To look back
And think that
This baby would one day save me
And the hope that
That you give
That you were born so I might really live
To look back
And think that
This baby would one day save me…

And the first time that you opened your eyes
Did you realize that you would be my Savior?
And the first breath that left your lips
Did you know that it would change this world forever?

And I
I celebrate the day
That you were born to die
So I could one day
Pray for you to save my life
Pray for you to save my life
Pray for you to save my life

Peace,
Sam
P.S. GO GATORS!
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