StumbleUpon

Holy cow, I'm addicted to StumbleUpon, a Firefox extension that allows you to surf the web by category.

Wow.

Check it out.
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on finishing perks

today i finished reading the perks of being a wallflower. melissa gave it to me. i wouldn't have thought that i would like it if you told me about it ahead of time, but for some reason i did. i really felt like i could relate to it. and it gave me a little insight into myself.

the thing is that my personality is very similar to charlie's, especially when i was in high school. quiet, introspective, insightful. but what strikes me is that charlie found outlets for what he felt through drugs or sex or drinking. of course, the point is that he just went along with everything, not really knowing whether he enjoyed those things or not. but still. it makes me think. i relate to charlie so well in feeling like there is something wrong with me, or in feeling like things are slipping away or spinning out of control. but i when was in high school, i suppressed most of those feelings and spun into my own imaginary world. fantasies of lsd, not lsd itself. and only a select few knew of my crippling depression until it started to seep out my senior year. but i can't help but wonder if part of the seriousness of my depression in high school was because i felt trapped. i felt like i had to bottle everything in. i wasn't allowed to go to parties or whatever. and girls didn't like me. unlike charlie, i didn't have girls ask me on dates. instead, i had to live vicariously through my friends' acid trips and their first forays into relationships and sex.

i don't know. i just think it's interesting. i just wonder how that has affected me.

peace,
sam
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blue like...

Well, once again it's been ages. I guess between school and wedding planning, I have a lot on my plate. But I'd really like to get back into blogging. That is, if anyone is still reading this thing.

I spent spring break at the Palmer Home for Children. It was a good experience: raking, cutting down trees, clearing brush, roofing, and spending time with some pretty cool kids. I'm sure I'll have more thoughts on the trip another time, but right now I'm still taking it in and chewing on it.

That's what happened last year with our trip to Waveland to help out folks through Lagniappe Church, the latest project of Jean Larroux. The guy is a stud, hands down. But when I was on the trip, I didn't really feel like I was getting anything out of it. A year later, though, and I can see what an influential trip it was for me.

On a somewhat unrelated note, I finally read Blue Like Jazz. I gotta say, I have mixed feelings. On the one hand, I did enjoy his candor, and I particularly liked his thoughts on loving people who aren't like us. On the other hand, I thought his version of Christianity seemed pretty watered down. The biggest flaw was that it seemed like his feelings pretty much determined everything he did. Rather than really seeking for the meaning of Scripture, he just sort of wandered around, letting the Bible influence him just as much as a TV show or a poem. That seems like a somewhat flaky version of Christianity, in my opinion. I think intellectual rigor needs to be a prominent part of Christianity, especially a devotion to attempting to understand the Bible on its own terms.

And it's entirely possible. I went to see a lecture by N.T. Wright, the formidable scholar, eloquent speaker, and Bishop of Durham. He spoke on "Paul's Jewish Gospel for a Gentile World," an extremely engaging and accessible lecture regarding the distinctive Jewish qualities of Paul's message. Partway through, he shifted gears and discussed "Paul's Gospel for a Post-Modern, Post-Secular, Neo-Imperialist World," an extremely relevant discussion of how to proclaim Christ as Messiah in the 21st century. He did it with charm, insight, feeling, and sound reasoning. I guess it can be done.

The other thing that bothered me about Blue Like Jazz, aside from the fact that it sounded like it was written by a seventeen year-old kid, is that Miller seems almost entirely ignorant of Christian history. His tone makes it sound like he has discovered some revolutionary version of Christianity. His whole account of his spiritual journey really doesn't differ much from Augustine, Wesley, Ignatius, or even Nathan Cole, a farmer who converted after hearing a sermon by Whitefield. I just feel like Miller could use a little perspective. American Christianity is by no means representative of all of Christianity. It's only a small facet of hundreds of years and hundreds of cultures. And each has had its flaws.

That's all for now. I'm tired. But I'm really going to try to write on this thing again. I'm now reading The Perks of Being a Wallflower and Life at the Bottom. You know, in addition to writing a ton of papers and reading a ton of books about Jesus and the Hindu goddess Sitala.

Peace,
Sam
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